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Psychological Domestic Turmoil and Tested Guaranteed Treatment

Ubqari Magazine - December 2014

Advise what I should do:

I am in madly in love with a boy. He also loves me a lot. We can die however cannot live without each other.  We want to get married. But there is a hurdle in getting married and that is my parents have kept a condition for him. The condition is that he should be a government employee if he needs to get married to me. I can feel that this condition is difficult to be fulfilled.  The only way now is to run away from home and get married.  His friends are also ready to help us in this regard. But now I am thinking that our parents might suffer a lot if we do this. My father is a very honorable person. He might not be able to bear this shock. Please advise me, one side is my family and other side is my love.

(Larkana)

Advice:  You are mature and that is why you have self-analyzed your problems yourself. Whatever you have highlighted is the reality. If you run away from you house, then you will have to face more critical situations. That is why do not try to do so. However you can advise the boy to try finding job elsewhere. Then you can try convincing your parents to remove the condition of government job and accept the proposal. In case your family still does not agree to this proposal, then you should respect their decision and leave your love.

May be…!!! Lack of love:

I am 52 years old, married and have 5 children. I have a good job and visit Pakistan three times in a year. I had a friendship on Facebook with a 22 years old girl. I did not tell her my correct age, instead told her that I am young. She lives in America. I am in love with her. Her picture is always on my mind. My family visits me twice every year. Whether they are here or in Pakistan, I am always lost in that girls thinking. I want to hear her voice for hours. I have sent her so much of money. But then she is not in touch with me now. She does not talk to me nor does she receive my call. I wanted to get married to her but she refused. I have no complaints from my wife but there is lack of love.

(Dubai)

Advise:  One woman has spent her life with you. She has faced difficult times with kids in your absence and never complained. Still you say that there is lack of love. This can be resolved. The love that you wanted to achieve was based on a lie. Your lie about age did not matter much as she has betrayed you. You need to respect and keep the love that you already have in your life.

Some Restrictions:

I have some problems due to which I have to work. Now there is an aged man who bothers me a lot. Whenever I see him angrily, he is scared. I have discussed this with one of my friend and she advised me to teach him a lesson. I thought of telling this to my brothers so that they can teach him a lesson but I do not want any sort of fighting. I want to solve this problem myself.

(Karachi)

Advise:  It is your right to work in case of problems. It is a fact that no man will trouble you unless he knows your personality weakness. It is quite possible that your personality does not show that confident and boldness.  It is advisable for the working women not to show weak personality. It is not good to involve family members in office matters. It is advisable that you stop him with your action. If the issue still persist, then you can complain about him to any authorized person in the office like you manager.

Strict Father:

One of the boy in my class misbehaved with me.  I slapped him and he did the same to me. Then my friends came to support me and we all together bet the guy.  We tore his shirt. One of my friend tied his neck with his own tie. Now this has been reported to the principal of the school. They have called our parents to talk. I have even apologized the boy but the story did not end. I am scared now as my father is very strict.

(Lahore)

Advise: There should be respect between boy and girls in co-education system. They talk to each other and help each other when required. I don’t think so that younger kids would also fight the way you all did. Especially fights in education system is not appreciated. You have been very rude to the boy which is not fair. Tying the tie around his neck is the worst act. Now you all girls should follow the instructions of your principal and parents after this incident.

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